Come, Be A Participant in Enhancing the Kingdom of God

Our LGBTQ+ Ministry will be sharing stories during June, Pride Month. Today, we share Ron's reflection.
 

Come, Be A Participant in Enhancing the Kingdom of God

 
Along with the rest of America, St. Paul’s LGBTQ+ Ministry is celebrating Pride Month. After reading, and re-reading what Mary Lou White wrote in last Sunday’s bulletin, I felt compelled to share my history with the LGBTQ+ community.
 
To be clear, I’m about as hetero a guy as they come. Hell, I’m 25+ years into my 3rd marriage! I also need to be clear, I wasn’t always as understanding and accepting of the gay lifestyle as I am now. Truthfully, I’ve been hit on by my gay brothers several times in night clubs in St. Louis. Once, I was hit on walking down the street in front of the Chicago Tribune building. It almost always p***ed me off!
 
But wait! There’s more . . . I like to dress well, my wife asks me for guidance on color coordinates, and it seems I also have a knack for growing flowers and for flower arrangement which leads my wife to always ask, “Are you sure you’re not gay?” That did not used to be a real ego booster! Thankfully I’ve learned that both males and females have interchanging tendencies, it’s just that one side is more dominate.
 
Born to a German Catholic family in west central North Dakota, a cradle-Catholic of the old order, interchanging tendencies or “different” was not something to be tolerated, and acceptance?? that was never going to happen!
 
All that changed for me when I found love and friendship with a young gay man in Indiana. Following the collapse of my second marriage, I was in extensive one-on-one therapy to try and find out just what I was doing to so badly screw up my life. Part of that therapy was a group session with six other screwed up people, one of which was this young graduate student.
 
Throughout these sessions we all became very close, as only those who have taken part in these sessions can know. As a result of these sessions, I heard, and experienced, a small part of the pain of rejection and loneliness this guy had felt. More than once all of us spent a lot of time in tears for what he had endured. I began to feel really guilty for what had been my attitude toward the gay community and for my anger for being hit on. Thankfully I had the opportunity to tell him how sorry I was for my beliefs and attitude and asked for his forgiveness. He graciously accepted my apology and asked only that I be more accepting of others. And then he dropped the hammer! He told me he was dying from Aids. Let me tell you, I could have slithered out under the door sill. He died a short time later. I attended his funeral and I’ve never seen more tears shed, my own included, than I did that day. We, and I, loved that guy. I still think of him often. He was one of the kindest, most loving, most forgiving human beings I’ve ever known. I wish I was more like him.
 
So, I’m a supporter of St. Paul’s LGBTQ+ Ministry. I’m not one of the “Honchos,” just a believer in the cause. My wife and I have attended the monthly gathering a couple of times and enjoyed it all. We for sure will be there this month God willing. I would encourage any and all to attend. First of all, it’s a good time, good food, good conversation, with good, caring people.
 
It’s an opportunity to grow ourselves, our community, and our common faith in God.

Ron Dietz, St. Paul parishioner

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